Letter: To our LGBTQ+ friends, I stand with you

Posted 6/13/19

In response to the coverage of the off-again, on-again Drag Queen Story Hour at Rogers Free Library, and opinions penned by those who believe representation equals indoctrination, I feel compelled to …

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Letter: To our LGBTQ+ friends, I stand with you

Posted

In response to the coverage of the off-again, on-again Drag Queen Story Hour at Rogers Free Library, and opinions penned by those who believe representation equals indoctrination, I feel compelled to offer a dose of reality.

Drag queens are the reason we are able to celebrate Pride — they initiated the LGBTQ+ civil rights movement by standing up and fighting back against chronic harassment and violence. Thanks to them, individuals who identify as LGBTQ+ know that they are not alone, and that they belong in our communities.

As a licensed therapist, I have helped countless individuals heal from the trauma of *not* having this representation -— of being rejected, bullied, and/or assaulted because of who they are and how they express that. The harm persists long after any unique incident — and for many, resurfaces when a situation like the opposition to DQSH arises.

I have never seen, in over 20 years of experience in multiple states, across the continuum of behavioral healthcare, ‘trauma’ or other harm caused by seeing someone in drag. Drag has been part of performance art since (at least) Shakespearean times. Movies like “Victor and Victoria”; “Priscilla, Queen of the Desert”; and “Hairspray” have been depicting drag queens for decades, with no discernable ill effects. “RuPaul’s Drag Race” ran for ELEVEN seasons, reaching a much broader audience than a library event could. Yet the only time I need to process drag with a client is when they have been shamed into hiding this aspect of themselves.

Comparing story hour to so-called ‘conversion therapy’ is disingenuous and contributes to the damage described above. This type of intervention is illegal in Rhode Island because of the damage it causes. Such comparisons perpetuate the stigma that those in the LGBTQ+ community are harmful to children, when it is actually the lack of acceptance that causes the most damage.

Children are not born judgmental — of themselves, or of others. When a young boy puts on makeup, walks around in high heels, or tries on a dress, the adult response of shutting down the behavior is what causes harm. Offering space and support to explore who they are leads to healthy, well-adjusted, secure development.

There is much more to say in response to the letter writers — that ‘the gays’ (insulting in itself) are not a homogenous group; that wanting to be accepted as ‘normal’ does not mean dressing, or acting, in any one manner; that a (presumably) straight writer using LGBTQ+ community members’ words to conclude that all is well in Bristol invalidates their lived experience; and that anyone who does not want to see DQSH in Bristol can simply choose NOT to attend — but it will fall on deaf ears.

So instead, I will say to my LGBTQ+ friends, loved ones, and neighbors, this is for you. I support you. I stand with you. I’ll fight with you. Until we don’t have to fight anymore.

Lisa Peterson
Bristol

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A lifelong Portsmouth resident, Jim graduated from Portsmouth High School in 1982 and earned a journalism degree from the University of Rhode Island in 1986. He's worked two different stints at East Bay Newspapers, for a total of 18 years with the company so far. When not running all over town bringing you the news from Portsmouth, Jim listens to lots and lots and lots of music, watches obscure silent films from the '20s and usually has three books going at once. He also loves to cook crazy New Orleans dishes for his wife of 25 years, Michelle, and their two sons, Jake and Max.