It’s not a program where I only take the best kids and the other kids fall by the wayside, or I say I only want the best 11 athletes. I want every kid.”

BMS Wrestling Coach David DeSisto

It was his life, and then it was gone. 

David DeSisto grew up with a passion for wrestling, and carried that love through all four years in high school and into the college ranks. But his life as a wrestler disappeared in an instant — erased by a car accident more than 25 years ago. 

“I thought wrestling was done with me at that point,” DeSisto said. “I thought it was over.”

But 10 years ago, it returned. 

“I was in the middle of a career change and I had time. I was coaching football. And two of my football players said they were wrestling. I don’t know if I was even aware that they (Barrington Middle School) had a team,” DeSisto said.

He went to watch his two players compete in a middle school wrestling match and the passion returned. He reached out to the BMS wrestling coaches at the time, and asked if they needed an assistant coach. No pay necessary — he just wanted to help. 

“The first day I went back in — there’s a smell with wrestling. Most people can’t stand it. But when you’re a wrestler…” he said, breathing in deeply and smiling. “Twenty five years and that smell hit me like roses. It was amazing. I fell right into it.”

DeSisto, or “Ruka” as others know him, is now the head coach of the BMS wrestling team. His love for the sport is equalled only by his enthusiasm for sharing it with others. 

“We don’t cut anyone,” he said. “They come into a sport they don’t know anything about, and I show them that they can accomplish things. Teaching every kid matters. Every kid can accomplish something every day. And every kid’s special. 

“It’s not a program where I only take the best kids and the other kids fall by the wayside, or I say I only want the best 11 athletes. I want every kid. I’ve had kids join this team with only two weeks left in the season. Right now we’re close to 40 kids. That’s a great year.”

Coach DeSisto is constantly recruiting for his team. He talks about wrestling all year round. And when it comes to potentials wrestlers, he does not discriminate. 

“There’s no type. If you have a heartbeat, you can be a wrestler,” Coach DeSisto said. “You’re never going to hear me say, ‘You’re too tall. You’re too skinny.’ Everyone can do it. That’s what’s great about the sport, if you’re willing to commit to it. That’s why we’ll never say no to anyone. The social workers will come to me. They’ll said, ‘This kid’s a lonely kid. This kid’s struggling.’”

Coach DeSisto will work with everyone. And he has his team members scouting for future wrestlers also. 

“This is one of the things I tell my kids when they’re recruiting. ‘Don’t just get kids who can help wrestling. Get someone who wrestling can help,’” he said. 

“You see that kid sitting in the cafeteria eating lunch by himself all alone? That’s a wrestler. 

“You see a kid who needs some friends? That’s a wrestler. 

“You see a kid who’s struggling? He’s making bad choices? Send him to me, because I can set him straight.”

The message has worked. The BMS Wrestling Team has become a home for all types of kids. Those who are dedicated to wrestling at the highest level, others who play football or baseball or swim, and some who have never played a sport. 

“Tons of kids have come in — we’ve had all these kids who are going to wrestle, play football in college, run track in college. And I’ve had other kids who have gone through the program and they’re succeeding by doing well in life,” he said. “I’ve had kids who made the middle school state (wrestling) finals and they don’t continue to wrestle in high school. They’ve gone and haven’t liked the program, the commitment — high school’s another level — but they’ve gone on to play other sports or who have other passions. Some will do theater. My son did football. He tried wrestling, but didn’t like it anymore. I tell kids, ‘Pursue what you love. Just take what I’ve taught you in wrestling, that desire, that confidence and put it where your passion is.’”

Those former middle school wrestlers make it a habit to remember their coach — DeSisto said they often stop by his workplace to say hi.  

“You wrestle for me, you’re my guy for life,” he said.

DeSisto said his team finished 12th in the state last year (out of 34 teams), and returned nearly all of its members. He praised the work of assistant coach Drew Genetti. 

“He has been a God-send,” DeSisto said, adding that Coach Genetti often handles technical instruction that is crucial for helping wrestlers improve on the mat. 

‘Dream job for me’

DeSisto said he loves what he does.

“Wrestling gave me everything. Everything I have in my life I got directly from wrestling or the confidence I got in wrestling. My friendships. All the bonds I have,” he said. 

DeSisto said he loves working with Barrington High School wrestling coach Sean Magee and developing a strong feeder program for the BHS. He also thanked the people who support the program — he named BHS Athletic Director George Finn and BMS Principal Dr. Andy Anderson. 

DeSisto said he has been approached about taking his coaching talents to other programs but would never want to leave Barrington Middle School.

“It’s my school. It’s my town. If I was anywhere else, I’d just be trying to get back here. One guy was trying to get me somewhere. I said ‘No, this is the dream job for me.’

“This is exactly where I want to be. This is where I’m supposed to be. I couldn’t be happier.”