'She was my biggest cheerleader,' Portsmouth man says of mom

Valley Inn’s Joe Occhi loses his mother, Dina, and brother-in-law in all-too-familiar tragedy

By Jim McGaw
Posted 11/15/17

PORTSMOUTH — Even at the ripe age of 90, Dina Occhi still had her hands in running the family business, The Valley Inn restaurant, a Portsmouth institution for 60 years.

“She …

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'She was my biggest cheerleader,' Portsmouth man says of mom

Valley Inn’s Joe Occhi loses his mother, Dina, and brother-in-law in all-too-familiar tragedy

Posted

PORTSMOUTH — Even at the ripe age of 90, Dina Occhi still had her hands in running the family business, The Valley Inn restaurant, a Portsmouth institution for 60 years.

“She never left the place,” said Joe Occhi, the restaurant’s owner and Mrs. Occhi’s son. “She lived upstairs and in her later years, when she really couldn’t do the work, she was firmly planted at the end of the bar. But I had to literally keep her from going behind the bar and into the kitchen doing work, more because I was worried about her.” 

An all-too-familiar tragedy struck the family Friday night, when Mrs. Occhi and her son-in-law, Ted White of Little Compton, were killed in a two-car collision just north of the restaurant on West Main Road. 

The driver of the car they were in, Maryann White — Mrs. Occhi’s daughter and Mr. White’s wife — is recovering from injuries she sustained in the crash.

The other driver, a 20-year-old man from Jamaica Plain, Mass., has been charged in the head-on collision with driving under the influence, death resulting.

Mrs. Occhi was the wife of the late Ennio Mario Occhi, who founded the The Valley Inn in 1957. He died in 2003. Joe Occhi, in between caring for his sister at the hospital Tuesday, spoke briefly about his mother and brother-in-law in a phone interview.

“Over the last 60 years my father and I have probably been the public face of the place, but neither one of us could have survived without my mom,” said Mr. Occhi. “She did all the dirty work and the best phrase I can give to you about her is ‘quiet strength.’”

Mr. Occhi, who coaches the Portsmouth High School boys’ basketball team, said his mom never asked for accolades for anything she did. “She had a pretty big effect on a lot of people without asking for any acknowledgement. She was content to stay in the background. But personally, she was always my biggest cheerleader, and she never missed an opportunity to be with the family,” he said.

Mrs. Occhi helped raise all her grandchildren and had “an exceptional relationship” with all of them, he said.

“One of things that makes me the proudest is when I run into people and they tell me what good young men or women my nephews or nieces have turned into as adults. Honestly, I can’t take credit. A lot of that comes from my parents and especially my mom,” Mr. Occhi said.

Tragic déjà vu

This isn't the first time the Occhi family has been the victim of a tragic auto accident.

Mr. Occhi’s brother, Michael, was killed in 2009 while riding a moped that was struck by a pickup truck in his hometown of Little Compton. He was 45. The driver of the pickup truck was charged with operating a motor vehicle under the influence of liquor, death resulting, and leaving the scene of an accident.

When Joe Occhi was notified of Friday’s accident — he received a call from an ambulance — he said he didn’t realize its severity at first. 

“But when I found out the reality of it, of course I flashed back. I couldn’t believe it; we have to go through this again,” he said.

The other victim of Friday’s crash, Ted White, 59, sustained a serious spinal injury about 25 years ago when a tractor trailer driver in Connecticut fell asleep at the wheel and rammed the car he and Maryann were in, Mr. Occhi said. 

Mr. White was confined to a wheelchair for the remainder of his life but never complained, his brother-in-law said.

“He adjusted to that better than anyone could expect,” Mr. Occhi said. “He had his arms and upper body, but had no use of his legs. But it didn’t really stop him. He drove; he had a vehicle fitted for him. He got around.”

Like Mrs. Occhi, Mr. White had a great love for his family, including his two sons and a daughter, he said. “He was his kids’ biggest backer and he was very, very proud of them,” Mr. Occhi said.

As for his sister Maryann, Mr. Occhi said she’s going through a rough time but is handling the situation extremely well considering the circumstances. She’s undergone surgery and was scheduled for another one later in the week.

“She’s alert and talking,” he said. “She’s very stoic, like my mother.”

Grateful for support

Mr. Occhi said he realizes the driver of the other car has been charged, but he’s not casting blame at this point.

“I want to get through the end of this and see what goes on without making any statement,” he said.

The Occhi family is grateful for the outpouring of support the family has received over the past several days, he said.

“The response from the community has been unbelievable and we all very much appreciate that.”

Joe Occhi, Valley Inn

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