It was one thing for Tiffany Quiterio to hear that 50 teachers at Kickemuit Middle School had staged a sick-out last month . To read the spiteful, angry comments flooding through social media …
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It was one thing for Tiffany Quiterio to hear that 50 teachers at Kickemuit Middle School had staged a sick-out last month. To read the spiteful, angry comments flooding through social media afterwards was another. Despite no longer having kids in the system, she knew something needed to be done.
Taking money out of her rent check, she booked Andreozzi Hall this past Wednesday, Feb. 13, and invited former Portsmouth police and school resource officer Scott Sullivan, and Bristol school shooting survivor Steven Bernard, to come out and speak. It was a modest crowd, including several parents and Bristol Warren Regional School Committee Secretary John Saviano, but Ms. Quiterio hoped it could at least get the ball rolling toward a resolution at her children’s former school.
In a conversation that lasted well into the evening, ideas were shared, tears were shed. As parent Michael Sumner put it, "this will never, ever leave my mind.”
A living example
Back during the winter of 1988, a 15-year-old Mr. Bernard felt he was on top of the world. As a football and baseball player at Bristol High School, he and his friends were at the top of the social food chain. In those days, there was no such thing as the term “bullying”; instead, he and his crew would “tease” or “pick on” the kids they felt did not fit in, while nobody said a thing.
“It would all get pushed under the rug because Friday’s football game was way more important than any of that stuff,” Mr. Bernard said.
Yet in a world he said is divided into choices and consequences, Mr. Bernard’s actions nearly spawned fatal results when, on the afternoon of Feb. 25, his classmate and regular target, Vincent “Vinny” Isabelle, shot him in the head with a .22 caliber gun. The shooting occurred at Bristol High School.
“Big, bad Steve was big, bad Steve, until then,” Mr. Bernard said.
Almost 31 years later, he still carries around the weight from that day: Partial paralysis on the left side of his body, and crippling depression. The bullet still remains in his skull. Yet Mr. Bernard knows he survived that day in order to serve a greater purpose.
“I’m here for that reason — just to say that one thing — that maybe will get through to you to change,” he said.
Spreading the message
Though it has been several years since he has spoken publicly about the incident, Mr. Bernard has shared his story more than 200 times throughout a 20-year span, all the while collecting information about bullying along the way. From the dependence on cell phones to the viewing of violent television programs, the tendency to either remain silent or encourage revenge — to Mr. Bernard, it all connects and leads to one instance of bullying after another.
“We have a society problem, not a teacher problem. We have a culture problem, not a parent problem,” he said.
While he has been busy putting his experience down on paper for a book set to be released within the next few years, in light of what has been happening at Kickemuit — where his daughter is currently an eighth-grade student — Mr. Bernard knew it was time to get back out there. Whether he comes in during the school day or hosts “dinner conversations” around town in the evening, Mr. Bernard is willing to help in whatever capacity he can.
“People look at me as a hero; that’s a bunch of crap. I’m not a hero, I’m an example — there’s a big difference.”
A proposed solution
Even though “Officer Sully” has since retired from his position at Portsmouth, Mr. Sullivan, to this day, still gets contacted from his former students regarding instances of bullying. For the last two and a half years, he has dedicated his life to becoming an expert on the subject and is eager to share that information with his neighbors in the East Bay. His knows his approach may not have all the answers, but Mr. Sullivan feels it could at least serve as a starting-off point toward a longer-term solution.
In order to know where to start, though, Mr. Sullivan believes it is crucial to understand what bullying even is and the amount of damage it can do:
Advice for all
With that in mind, Mr. Sullivan then offered suggestions that the middle school could build from:
While both men had plenty to say about the topic of bullying, they both agreed that without a full community approach, their words could only go so far. Mr. Sullivan can be reached at bullyhelpnow@yahoo.com or on his Facebook page, Sully on Bullying. Mr. Bernard can be reached at linebacker4u56@gmail.com.