Recently, Arlene Violet wrote a column criticizing the Catholic Church. First, I will admit that the church is not perfect, because man is involved in its operation.

Among the issues she mentioned was the fact that the church does not allow eulogies. Here is a situation where I totally disagree with her criticism.

I am a deacon. I would like to address this issue and explain why eulogies are not allowed, based on my personal experience. I would like to point out it is not the church that resulted in prohibiting eulogies, but it is the result of the actions of God’s people.

I will give you three examples based on my own experience.

The first involved the funeral of a young relative of mine. We were asked if the school he went to could give a short eulogy. We sat down with them and a teacher came up with five fellow students and gave a brief by meaningful homily.

Then the principal took it on his own to come up with his hat on and essentially say, “Don’t pay attention to what was said, life is short so do whatever you please.”

The next incident was when a lawyer was given the okay to give a eulogy. He said little about the deceased by promoted his business. His eulogy was nowhere near what he said he would say.

The next incident involved a man who was given permission to give a eulogy and he proceeded to condemn the deceased, as he had a grudge against him. Again, he did not present what he said he was going to say. This was shameful and embarrassing to everyone. He also violated the sanctity of the funeral Mass.

The point is that, yes, we can screen the homilies, but when the person gets up to give the eulogy, you don’t know what the person will say. I write this so that people recognize that the Catholic Church is not the mean entity that was portrayed in Arlene Violet’s column.

Finally, there are other times that a eulogy can be given. I allow them to be done at the committal, which, to me, is a much more intimate environment.

Deacon Dominic DiOrio

Bristol